Zacharoo

We have had several nicknames for Zachary over the last year. 'Zachy,' of course, is his primary nickname.

Today he was crying for a second and I look over and Totgirl was singing to him,

"Zacharoo...Zacharoo...."

And he was loving it, loving his sister singing his 'nickname' to him. 'Zacharoo' was one of his earlier nicknames and it has been awhile since we have called him that. I cannot think of a sweeter way to be reminded....

And, I loved seeing his sister, our darling totgirl, providing him comfort and seeing him respond to her so fondly. Watching their relationship develop...is a beautiful thing.

 

NearPerfectWednesday

What a great day we have had. Both my babies were in great moods and loads of fun.

Totgirl was in a happy, playful mood. She played, ate three meals, and took a nap...and all without a fight! YIPPPEEEEE!!!! I made sure throughout the day the day to let her know just how much I enjoyed her and to praise her over and over and over again!

Today she was really into birthday party play. Not surprising I guess since she did go to two parties over the weekend. She also enjoyed some outside play (despite all the wasps and bees....UGG!). She read lots of books. Watched a little tv, not too much...far too happy a girl today to be bogged down by a tv! Played babies and preschool of course. Just using her imagination. Soveryfun to see.

Zachy stood independently today! Several times! Never though it was possible, but his HUGE smile got BIGGER! It's the utterly amazing uncensored look of pride only little kids seem to be able to have when they accomplish something huge. LOVELOVELOVE IT! Not walking, but he practiced with his sit 'n' stand walker outside on the front patio. He was working so hard at it, I could tell his legs were getting tired...back and forth, back and forth. Finally, since I could tell he needed a rest and his poor knees were getting all scraped up, I got him to sit on it and I pushed him . At this point I got mad at myself for not getting one of those sit 'n' stand push 'n' ride toys that has a long handle on it so you don't have to bend over...you'd think I'd learn the second time around! But, I solved that problem by having Mackenzie push him. And they both enjoyed this and life was good for everyone.

And there was yet another Zachy 'first' today...he pretended to talk on the phone. Mackenzie would not 'talk' on the phone until she could walk...wonder where she saw that modeled?
So, that was our day, a simple and yet near perfect Wednesday.
And, lastly....how 'bout a totmusing...

In the sweetest, most innocent little totvoice, she says, 'Momma, how about I eat some vegetables and then have some cookies?'  Again, again and again with big, pleading eyes and everything....my little totactress!

TotbabycollegeConferences

Today I had 'Parent Teacher Conferences' at the totbabycollege.

First we, Mom and Dad, met with Miss Anne of the preschool room. She assured me that 3 year olds becoming psychotic tyrants is perfectly normal. I am still trying to decide whether this is good or bad news. Both, I suppose. But really, Mackenzie is doing just wonderfully at preschool. She is right where she needs to be. Sometimes she is reserved and quiet, if that is what space she is in, but when she wants to play, she is social and interacts in fun with no problems. She is in a place where she free to be who she is and to learn how to take care of herself and her emotions. She is respected and cared about for who she is. Momma is grateful that she is given this freedom and surrounded by unconditionally accepting adults. She also gets along great with her friends and is well liked. Her teacher said that she loves to see how bonded the core group is, the ones who have made the journey together from the babyroom to the tot A room to the tot B room and now to the preschool room.

In the room they have a list of each child's favorite things...Mackenzie listed her favorite things as:

1. Color: Pink
2. Animal: Tiger
3. Toy: Babies
4. Food: Spaghetti
5. Things that go: Boat
6. Song: ABC Song

After meeting with Miss Anne, Momma met with Miss Kim from the infant room. On the way back to the conference room, I got a peak at Zachy. He was playing at the door of the infant yard, trying to put on some adult shoes, which is something he does at home with my blue croc like shoes. And then I see him look up at Miss Karla and try to hand her the shoe. I could tell he was chatting about something. Just engaged in his little babyroom world. Content. Happy. Awesomely cared for. Miss Kim talked about how much they love Zachy and love having him in the room. She said she wishes that he came more and that, "He brightens the room the minute he gets here." I have no doubt Miss Kim and the crew love all their babies, but I also have no doubt they are taken with his charm...the smile, the big eyes, the laugh, the sense of humor...the Zachy and all that is the Zachy. She talked about how he climbed on the food table one day (I said, 'Only once? I'm surprised.'). Talked about how he and two of the other older babies in the room sit on top of the babyclimber and laugh at one another; How cute is that?!?! She talked about how he is trying to figure out how to cross the room barriers, which is the unofficial official indication that the baby is ready to move to tot A. She talked about how much they are going to miss him when he moves on, which is coming up in this next month. And, we talked about how much we will miss 'working' together. What a gift we have been given. These people have taken such amazing care of my babies. Sososo very lucky.

After Miss Kim and I finished talking, I got another glimpse of Zachy in his room. He was playing with a mobile and then Miss Karla picked him up and put him on her shoulder. They walked through the room and he was smiling BIG! He grabbed at a flag hanging from the ceiling and (I could tell) said 'That' as he pointed his finger. Miss Karla brought him over to the window and he smiled when he saw me. Usually he would reach out and be upset unless I was holding him. But today he was OK. He is totally secure in the babyroom. I know he loves his Momma, I know he is strongly attached to me, but he was OK just looking at me through the window while Miss Karla held him. This gives me peace, peace and gratitude. Knowing my kids are in a place where they feel happy and secure, doesn't get better than that!

WeekendStuff

A pretty terrific weekend, I'd have to say.

Mackenzie continues to have this random fever here and there. Today she has been complaining of her teeth hurting and points to the same spot, so I am hoping this means molars, which would explain A LOT....poor sleep, poor appetite, and irritability (using the word 'irritability,' is putting it, shall we say...mildly). But, I do have to say that given her challenges mood and otherwise, she has had an exceptional weekend....

Two parties, two round trip trips to town, not enough napping, sleep a little bit later than usual last night...all that and really her only meltdowns (given the challenges listed above) were yesterday morning and a long one at night and a few little ones today. So, she hung in there! And, she had a GREATGREATGREAT time at her two parties, with her friends. Oh, I feel like a criminal for forgetting my camera. The sight of her and her friends today, in their party dresses running and playing and laughing....P.R.I.C.E.L.E.S.S.

I already talked about BFF Saige's party yesterday. Today was a party for Danielle. Truthfully, she is not a friend Mackenzie talks about too much, but I know how much work goes into putting together a party and wanting it to be superspecial for your child, so I felt that it was important to be there, for Danielle and her mother and for Mackenzie as well.

When Mackenzie got there, the JoJo arrived at the same time. Those girls started playing immediately and the overtired daughter I had 5 minutes before, was no more. Her and JoJo did the TotPower thing...running off, not listening to the moms, walking through mud and feeling totally smitten with their rebellious totselves. It was AWESOME. They were both a little hesitant to get in to the Princess Jumper, but laid down at the entrance side by side in their little party dresses, on their stomachs with their little bare feet crossed, chins on their hands looking in. What a sight! Mackenzie and JoJo ate next to one another and shared conversation...AAAAHHHHH, I LOVED IT. LOVED seeing my little girl with her friend, interacting and having FUN. I could go on and on...

Saige got there a little late and the twosome quickly became a threesome. Running and playing and laughing. All three walking away together, all in their party dresses. They all played together so nicel, hand in hand in hand at times. Nobody was left out, they were all enjoying and enjoyed equally. When it was time to leave, Mackenzie cried. I had tried to have her leave her earlier, since she was pretty clearly tired, but as long as JoJo and Saige were still there...not an option. She conked out on the way home. For the first time I did something I never thought I would do...I actually wished the drive were longer and drove below the speed limit and took a detour to, in fact, make the ride longer. All worth it...

And Zachy. I feel like I am in serious need of some time alone with him. I think next weekend I have to figure out a way to make that happen, which would also give Mackenzie some time with dad. Also important.

But, despite being away for the larger part of the day, I did get to have some good fun with the Zachy...my so amazing little boy. And, as always, he makes me smile. Of course when I got home he cried for me to pick him up. He missed me. First, we cuddled on the couch for a bit. He likes to push my head to the side now. This cracks him up and he does it over and over and over again and laughs and laughs and laughs, each time like it is the first time. Then I sat with him while he ate some bean stew. He and I talked Zachytalk. I tickled his feet and we played a game with his sippy cup. Simple. Fun. That is myZachy. He has a stick right now that he brought in the house, which is currently his favorite toy. Why, I don't know. But all that matters is HE thinks it is the GREATEST thing ever. And we played with whistles. He has figured out how to use the whistle; He, Mackenzie and I all had whistles and whistled away together...

We had family dinner tonight, steak. Mackenzie usually loves to have a little steak, but not tonight. She just had potato as did Zach. He sat in his high chair and she set herself up a table next to the table and we had to share between the tables, just like at....preschool. After that was bathtime. Definitely two kids who needed to be cleaned up from our busy weekend. Then...jammers time. Mackenzie in her new spongebob longjohns and Zachy in mickeymouse longjohns. So.Cute. Both of them. I know I always say it, but kids in their pajamas....deliciously cute.

Lastly, a little totmusing for the day....
After getting dressed this morning I wanted to do a temp check on Mackenzie. She said, "I look hot."

PartyTime

Totgirl went to her first schoolfriend party. A party for Miss Saige. Mackenzie LOVES Saige. They have been friends since the baby room, along with several other friends...JoJo, Emerson, Andrew, and Mathew. The core group. All were at the party today except for Andrew. After  getting home, Mackenzie went through her party favor bag and got to have some candy. Big smile, 'Candy's are a yummy!' she said.  Tomorrow we have another party, for Danielle (another friend from totbabycollege).

Totgirl had her own first official party this year. We did not invite friends from school, unfortunately (Momma was not sure what the correct edict was on this). But next year for sure! She had a great time though. We had it at the local animal sanctuary/zoo. Her grandparents came for the event as well as friends. She felt like a super special princess that day. On the way home she said what a fun time she had with such excitement. Her feeling so special, made all the planning and work well worth it. The party was also for Zachy, of course. But he was not quite as aware. Momma cried when we all sang Happy Birthday to my kids. Moments like that just remind me of how fortunate I am.

Some photos from their party...

TotMusing

Once totgirl started talking, life just got funnier. A lot of things she says can get lost in translation. Written words lack her totvoice, her facial expressions, and her body language. Things that make things she says and does all that funnier. But,.here are a few of my favorite totmusings spoken by my totgirl!

1. Over the past year, totgirl has been a napfighter. One week not too long ago, she was on day two of not napping. The previous day had been rough; By 3 pm she was in full meltdown mode.
So, I said to my totgirl, 'Mackenzie, remember what happened yesterday when you would not nap? You got very tired and grumpy in the afternoon.'
And how did my totgirl respond? She, very seriously, said. 'I not gonna be tired and grumpy today, Momma. I POSITIVE!'
(To which I thought to myself, 'REALLY totgirl? Where you HERE yesterday? And when did you learn the word positive?')

2. What better way for a potty training totgirl to avoid naptime? Decide you have to go poopy right when it's time to nap. That's right. One day after fighting her nap for a good half hour I finally get her into bed. Within 5 minutes she tells me she has to go poopy. What is a mother to do? Deprive her deartot of pooping? Of course not! So, I walk her to the potty. As if feeling some sort of remorse, she says in the most fake sad voice I have heard, 'I guess I not gonna take a nap today.'

3. Totgirl has her own sense of style; Her own likes and dislikes. Last winter, she disliked pants. A lot. At home she would usually just wear a shirt, diaper and black paten leather shoes. Oh, and a hat. One morning Dad was getting her dressed for the day and I hear him say, 'Does JoJo wear pants.'
'Nooo,' says totgirl.
'Does Emerson wear pants?'
'Noooo,' says totgirl.
'Does Miss Lisa wear pants?'
'Noooo, Miss Lisa no wear pants,' says totgirl.
(Really? Your teacher doesn't wear pants? What exactly is going on at totbabycollege?)

4. There comes a point where, as a Mom, you think you are outsmarting your kids by doing things like sticking vegies in their food. Not really the brightest idea, since toddlers can be picky eaters to start with. So, rocket scientist MiaMomma makes homemade mac and cheese and adds in some carrots and broccoli and actually believes that this will somehow persuade her to try it. What was her response? 'I don't want carrots and broc in the mac and cheese, I want ICE CREAM in the mac and cheese!'

5. Totgirl asked to read Pinkalicious one day. I could not find it amongst her books and asked if she knew where it was.
'Hmmm. I think we need to look for it.' So, we look and look and look and don't find Pinkalicious.
The next day SHE brings it up again and wants to 'search' again for it with me. I ask her if she knows where it is. She says, 'I sure think it might be on the shelf in the back.' And guess what, it was. Something tells me a certain little totgirl knew exactly where it was...all along.

6. One day I hear a very loud noise and ask totgirl what it was. She states, very matter of fact, 'A mess.' And, indeed, it was!

7.Totgirl calls me in still to look at her poop. She is proud of it, what can I say. After awhile, you start to run out of encouraging things to say. One day I say, 'Wow, Mackenzie, you are a good pooper!' She responds with a very proud, 'I AM a good pooper!

8. Totbabycollege held a Back to School night last month. I was preparing totigrl for the evening, explaining that Mommy and Daddy would talk to her teachers while she played with her friends and then everyone would eat and play outside together. Her one big concern? 'Momma, please no talk to my friends, okay?' She's THREE! Isn't she still supposed to think I'm supercool?

9. Lately totgirl has not only been into 'Poo Poo,' but also police officers and jail. One day I committed some offense and she sends me to the jail. I ask where that is and she thinks really hard and says, 'By the poo poo.' Of course, silly me!

10. And now, for my alltime favorite TotMusing...Awhile ago the 'Why' word entered totgirl's world. When this happened, the word 'Why' quickly replaced 'No' as my least favorite word. One day she was asking 'Why' I could not do something that involved being two places at once.
I said, 'Because I am a person.'
My very smart totgirl said, 'You're not a person. You're a Mommy!'
Oh, THE IRONY!

9.24.10WeeklyPhotos

I want to try to put a few photos up weekly....so here's my first effort.

Zachy loves being outside and exploring. He goes all over our backyard...through dirt and shrubs and loves every moment of it!

Mackenzie and Zachy reading together....translation: Mackenzie trying to 'read' her books, while Zachy tries to get them from her!

From our MommyTotHomeDay...it ended up being the best thing for both of us. We had lots of quiet and Mackenzie was able to catch up on some rest...

Playing dress-up on our MommyTotHomeDay...

One night after Mackenzie went to bed, Zachy was not quite ready and we played blocks. He loved banging them together....

Going down the slide, together....and the Zachy handmouthflap! Oh, and check out totgirl's cool glasses....

Zachy mastering the spoon!

Totgirl, Zachy and Rufus dog playing together...

Zachy peaking through the hideaway...

And totgirl playing grocery store..."That be ten and six-fifteen."

ZachyAndTheBaster

I look forward to my before bed time with Zachy. Our days can be hectic and I don't always feel like he gets enough solo attention. But this is the time that we get to spend together....playing a little, snuggling a little, loving a lot.

Tonight we played with a turkey baster. Yep, a turkey baster. He thought it was the greatest thing EVER! It looked a little strange; So he put it is in his mouth, of course. I made it puff air in his face and he threw back It was comical. Being bopped in the head was not so funny, but his reaction....the laugh, the hysterical baby laugh....that was funny! Lessons about hitting will come....he did just turn 1 afterall. For tonight, we got to enjoy a little SillyBedtimeFun.....together, just Zachy and Momma and the TurkeyBaster.

KneeFever

Totgirl has a fever today. She went to school and had a pretty good day as far as I know. Suddenly she snuggles up to me and she feels warm...as high as 102 warm. I ask if anything hurts and in her most sickly voice, she says, "My knee." Even with a fever the girl makes me laugh.

Mirrors

At about 6 months old totgirl discovered that she could see and follow me through the mirror. She would get a little twinkle in her eye and just watch.follow.laugh...

I'm not sure Zachy found it quite as amusing...but I sure did!

WonderfulToday

Wonderful things happened today...

1. Totgirl woke up at 6:25! This was AWESOME. She had a FANTASTIC day. Rested. Fun. Playful. Happy.Happy.Happy. LOVED IT!
2. Zachy discovered the magnets on the refrigerator and was captivated.
3. Totgirl and Zachy played outside with RufusDog under the Little Tikes climber...cutecutecute. RufusDog really loves his 'friends.'
4. Totgirl said. 'I got the toots! I STINKY!!!' with enthusiastic pride.
5. Zachy began to master use of the spoon, at 13 months...impressive!
6. Well, the next one is not so wonderful, but it did happen. Totgirl said, 'I done with Bucee.' Totgirl has moved on and is now 'attached' to 'Mickey (really Minnie) Mouse, which she got at the Dollar Store yesterday. I (Momma) miss Bucee already.
7. Zachy 'asking' for popcorn. He might not talk, but he got his message across loud and clear! He had it for the first time on Monday and LOVES it. He recognized it right away, pointed and loudly yelled 'DAT!'
8. After running the wrong direction after I asked her to come in, totgirl fell and skinned her knee pretty good. Her response, 'I sure think some apple juice would make my knee feel better.' Nice try totgirl!
9. I got to have a snugglefest with my two babies before bed.
10. Zachy pretty much put himself to sleep in his crib tonight! This makes me wanna dance! (And he did so while totgirl and I laid on the bed in the room. They were really pretty funny; She would whisper something to me and then he would dart up and start Zachytalking. Finally, he did just lay down and go to sleep though.)
11. Both my kids looked adorable in their jammers. This is hardly specific to today, but there is nothing more wonderful than kids in pajamas. Not just because it means bedtime is near, but they really, and I mean really, look insanely cute.

Just lovin' my kids and feeling grateful for our WonderfulToday. Lucky, Lucky Me!

SiblingConspiracy

I lovelovelove how totgirl dumps out all her most cherished worldly possessions right in front of Zachy and expects him to have self control. And, I lovelovelove that no matter how engaged Zachy is in something else, he will immediately drop everything and anything he is doing to interfere with whatever it is she is doing.

Totgirl and Zachy might only be three and one, but they bicker constantly. Their bickering happens in part because they are both impulsive beings (age appropriately so) and in part because they both, I am convinced, intentionally try to annoy one another. They bicker about toys, about space, and about having my attention. I neverever would have imagined that a one and three year could argue so much. Really, I find myself looking at them with my jaw on the floor, utterly astounded. I spend most of my time trying to engage one in an activity to keep them from the other only to have the other decide they want to do, make that MUST DO, what the one is doing. Wipes.Me.Out! I am convinced that packnplays were invented because of siblings. I have not yet resorted to confinement, but it IS tempting!

And the screaming; Even Mr. not-talking-yet Zachy manages to get his 'message' across with a screaming ramble of sorts. And totgirl, we KNOW she can keep up with the best of 'em when it comes to screaming and yelling. As far as she is concerned, persistence pays. And, persistent she IS. We have started to implement 'calm down' time with her. This happens when she is screaming and screaming and (usually) demanding and demanding...instead of sending her to a 'naughty corner,' we now ask that she goes in the other room and have some 'calm down' time. Seems to be working so far, well as much anything...meaning, it has it's effective moments. Zachy is still a little young for this, and actually, he has not hit the spiraling out of control screaming and demanding phase. Not yet, anyways...but there's always hope he'll reach this 'milestone' sooner than later...

Occasionally, they do have moments where they 'play' together in harmony or side by side without causing one another mayhem. Almost always they have these moments after Dad gets home from work. I kid you not. All day long they can be screaming, in one another's space, climbing over and practically assaulting me as they compete for my attention. Then Dad gets home and they suddenly develop the ability to play quietly, side by side, each engaged with their own toys...or, even better...they actually share! At these times, I am convinced they are aligned in some sort of covert siblingconspiracy to make MiaMomma, TheirMomma, look i.n.s.a.n.e.!

MommyTotDay

Today is Tuesday and usually a totbabycollege day for the totgirl and a work day for me. For whatever reason, totgirl has been waking up really early, pre-5 a.m., for the last week. She has been having increasingly difficult days and it has been painful to watch her. I know she is tired. Really tired. I don't know why she keeps waking so early. She does seem to go through a period in the fall where her sleep is disrupted, as the days start to get shorter. But, I don't recall it being this extreme.

Last night she was up and down between 3:30 and 5:30 a.m. I felt worried about taking her to school, knowing how sensitive she has been and what a hard time she has been having managing herself. We all get cranky when we are tired (Trust me, I am the first to acknowledge this...I have gotten unreasonable numerous times over this last year due to pretty extreme sleep deprivation). But, unlike us adults, who really do need to learn to deal with it (easier said than done at times), three-year olds just can't. They are THREE.

Zachy, has been sent to the totbabycollege, so he can play with his friends. I have tried to keep her staying home as low key as possible and as a special MommyTotDay; I don't want her to think she can 'use' being tired as an excuse to stay home on days she is feeling school resistant (and she is smart enough to keep such a thing in that memory bank of hers and pull it out when she wants to use it to her advantage). So, my hope is that she will have a quiet day and a long nap. Perhaps having a mellow, low stress day will help her get some better rest tonight as well.

I have to say, having been with two kids day after day, being home with one is almost like being alone, but better. We are having a lovely morning together. She is in a great mood (of course) not having to compete for attention. But, she did say, 'I miss my brother.' Awww, I guess absence does make the heart grow fonder...even for a sassytotgirl!

AntLovers

Zachy picked up an ant today. I didn't realize it until I heard him make a little Zachy sound. So, I looked and saw an ant on his little hand. I got it off and he promptly picked up another one. Curious little guy he is and perhaps and AntLover.

Totgirl was bit once by ants. When I was pregnant with Zachy we were walking and she stood on an anthill. Right as I was trying to get her off it, she starts screaming and did so for the next hour, at least.

But, that didn't stop her, too, from being an AntLover. In early Spring of this year she was playing outside and brought me an ant. Recalling the traumatic event from less than a year earlier, I grabbed a tissue and squished it. She went outside and brought in another shortly after. I went to get a tissue and she said, 'No Momma, I take it outside now.' I am sure she also muttered something like, 'Crazy AntHater Momma.'

ThreeFootTallTotMonster

Shortly after Zachy was born...This...

Quickly turned to this...

Poor totgirl. Her world had been rocked. We tried to explain the whole baby brother, big sister thing beforehand, but her second birthday was just four days before he was born, so her ability to really comprehend the whole thing was quite limited.

The day before Zachy was born, totgirl and I had a pretty spectacular day. Our day was oddly spontaneous, given that it was a Wednesday (which was the day in between my work days, so we usually stayed very close to home). But that day, she woke up unusually early. We went to the park in the morning and then she napped early. Totgirl needed some new sneakers, so I thought, 'What the heck...let's venture to the mall.' For many, this would not be something they thought through, but we live an hour from the mall, so it really isn't a simple trip. But, she was up from her nap by 12:30 and I figured it might be one of our last chances to get there before 'he' was born (little did I know how true this was!). So, to the mall we went. We had a great time. She played in the playarea and ran my 8 month pregnant self around. All the other totlets seemed to be much more subdued than my girl, but she did manage to gather quite a few smiles as she ran and ran...and had me chase and chase her. She was exceptionally free spirited that day; We both were, and people enjoyed it... they enjoyed watching her and her spunk.

We got home, had our normal nighttime routine. All was going as usual until about 12:30 a.m. when I realized my water had broken. My biggest thoughts at that time were about her. I was so worried about her and how this was all going to impact her, my baby girl. I wasn't feeling ready...but, once the water breaks, there is no choice.

Totgirl went to my friend Julie's house. Julie and her husband Dan and their boys were such an amazing  support to her over the next couple of days as she would visit them when Dad needed to be at the hospital. Of course totgirl came and visited and met her new brother. She was so sweet. And probably quite confused. She called her new brother, 'Cute.' She suddenly needed her Dad to carry her all over and would ask him to do so by saying, 'Q...Q me.'

Zachy was born on a Thursday and came home two days later. Totgirl came with Daddy to the hospital and we all made the drive home together, as a new family of four. Totgirl was a little shy for a half hour or so. I remember the moment reality set in for her. I was on the couch trying to feed him. She looked at us, got the saddest expression on her face, and just started to cry. She cried. I cried. We cried. For about five minutes. And then she was done and started to play. I think it took me longer to recover; I can still cry when I see that look in my memory, the look on her face right as it all hit her.

Our next six weeks were a blur. Totgirl was mad at me for sure. She would shun me every chance she got. I felt disconnected from her at times, which was very very hard. Before I knew her every move before she made it. Suddenly, we were out of sync. She would be wearing things I had not dressed in her, eating things I had not made...it was surreal.

We would watch the Sunny Side Up Show on Sprout and they would hand out Good Egg Awards. One day at Target I got her a little microphone. She would walk around with it saying, 'ZZ good egg, ZZ good egg.' (The story of ZZ is yet to come...but ZZ refers to her). Then she would call Daddy a good egg...Buddy the cat a good egg...Poopus (Rufus) the dog a good egg...Zachy a good egg.

I asked, 'What about Mommy? Is Mommy a good egg?'
To which she would reply, 'Daddy a good egg.'

Put me in my place! It was probably about 6-8 weeks after Zachy was born that she finally let me be a good egg and I also remember around that time knowing that I had my totgirl back. Ahhh... my sweetjoy!

But what about the ThreeFootTallTotMonster? Well, I may have gotten my totgirl back, but the playing field had changed. She had discovered that she had all sorts of power when it came to me needing to take care of Zachy. When I was trying to feed (nurse) him or put him down for naps, in particular, she would become a totgonewild. Sure, I would try to get her set up in some sort of quiet activity, but staying set in that activity required totcooperation, something she had NO intention of doing. Once when I was feeding him, I recall her taking cat food and dumping it all over the house in piles. I did not react, which took everything I had in me, but I did not want her to know that she was getting to me. I will say, she never did do that one again.

Somewhere between 6-9 months was particularly challenging. Zachy was not a great sleeper at night or during the day, so I was worn thin. When I would try to put him to sleep, I would go in the other room, dim the lights, put on white noise, all that 'good' stuff. But the one thing the 'books' don't account for is the ThreeFootTallTotMonster. Yep,  I would bribe her with a bottle of milk, even chocolate at times, and Caillou and hope and pray that he would fall asleep before she was done. But, of course not...THAT might have allowed me to have some peace....some sanity. I could hear her coming. My heart would start racing. I would feel short of breath. My head would start spinning. Panic. Here it comes....it is in the door...it is going to talk...REALLY LOUD...yep, it's her...

I swear she might as well have been ten feet fall during those times. She would drag toys in with her...the loudest toys she could find, the ones she NEVER played with otherwise. The whole experience was quite hideous. There were times I would find myself laughing, but only out of pure insanity.

My ThreeFootTallTotMonster is not totally gone...but one can hope we continue to see less and less of it and more and more of my sweet littletotgirl!

Regardless, she is a lovable little creature...just look at her....

Whether she is the ThreeFootTallTotMonster  or my sweet littletotgirl, I lovelovelove her like CRAZY!

GleeTime

Glee has it's season premiere tomorrow. When I was on maternity leave with Zachy, Glee's first season had just started.

With Mackenzie I had a full three months of MommyMackenzieBondingLoveTime before going back to work. When I went back to work after Mackenzie was born, I went back part time and only two days a week; Those were her days to play at the totbabycollege. So, when I was on maternity leave with Zachy, we got to spend those two days together, just him and Mommy. Tuesdays, more often than not, seemed to involve some sort of doctor's appointment or errand. But Thursdays, I made sure we got to stay home together and have MommyZachyBondingLoveTime! First thing in the morning, we would watch the previous night's episode of Glee. Just snuggle in bed and watch. So, for me, Glee is not just a good show, but really pretty special. Glee was part of my very special time with my very special babyZachy, who, by the way, is officially THIRTEEN months today!

Here is Zachy then....

And here is Zachy now....

I loved him then more than I could imagine was possible and somehow continue to love him more and more each day!...



PaintedSky

This morning, in her very sweet totvoice, totgirl looks outside at 6 a.m. and says:

"I think it gonna rain today. Look at the sky. It's blue clowds. It's pretty clowds. It's painted."

Where'sBucee?

Totgirl's imaginative play is growing by leaps and bounds. She uses her imagination to pretend things are different things, like sitting on the slide and pretending it's a train. She now has imaginary friends; Her BFF at school is Saige right now and at home she has an imaginary Saige, who she at times refers to as 'pretend Saige.' One thing I love about imaginary friends is that they involve less mess. Not that I am a clean freak; I lost all ability to even attempt cleaning once I had my kids. A friend once pointed out that cleaning when you have kids is like shoveling when it is snowing. So.Very.True. So, I do the minimum, which, much like credit card debt, when you 'do' the minimum, it just continues to grow...and grow....and grow. But, I'm okay with this, for now...

Oh, but moving on back to the less of a mess idea with the imaginary friends. Now when she plays preschool, she has her imaginary friends with her. Before, she would use her (naked)babydolls as the friends. This meant setting out all twentysomething of them all over with blankets and stuffed animals and plates and cups and...well you get the idea. Now that her friends are imaginary, they also have imaginary blankets and stuffed animals and plates and cups and...well you get the idea. LOVE IT! House is still messy, but at least I am not folding 40 blankets 40 times throughout the day, putting away stuffed animals and (naked)babydolls and, well...you get the idea!

So, who is Bucee? Yesterday she was playing outside and had her totsize stroller, which looked empty, but, as she pointed out, she had her baby in it. She was taking care of her baby, sending it down the slide, putting it in the swing. I go inside and come back out and now she has replaced the imaginary baby in the stroller with a random 4 inch baby rattle yellow critter thing that can hang from the car seat bar.

I ask who that is and she says, 'That my baby.'
'Oh, and what is your baby's name?'
'B...B...Bucee!' 
'(Perplexed)Bucee? (Supportive)Oh...Bucee!' What a pretty name.

Up until now she has not really named anything. She has used different familiar names or versions of names, but always associated to something she was relating to her in her immediate environment at the time. When she was practicing her role as a big sister and being mommy to her little brother, she was also figuring out peer relationships and would refer to her BFF JoJo in everything she did. So, everything was JoJo; She named rocks JoJo, stuffed animals were JoJo, dolls were either JoJo or JoJo's babybrother or even JoJo's Mommy. Totgirl saw JoJo as being her secret source of power and control. If you wanted her to do something she didn't want to, she would scream some random thing about JoJo, 'Nooooo. I take care of JoJo. I no nap. JoJo nap.' (Oh, okay totgirl.) And, best of all, you never knew who or what was JoJo at that time. So, we were constantly in trouble for disrupting JoJo the rock, the doll, the ball....the whatever.

So, Bucee, is the first time she has come up with a name on her own. Where she got Bucee, I don't know. I would venture to say she has not heard the name Bucee before. So, now that she had named this random 4 inch baby rattle yellow critter thing that can hang from the car seat bar, she decided she has an increased attachment to it; Got busy swaddling it, taking it to bath and of course to bed. In the middle of the night, I kid you not, the girl shot up in bed from what I think was a sound sleep and yelled, 'WHERE'SSSSS BUCEE?' She has continued to take care of 'Bucee' this morning and even had 'Bucee' in her tummy. So, for today, we now have a 'Bucee' in the house....to some it might look like a random 4 inch baby rattle yellow critter thing that can hang from the car seat bar, but to totgirl, it is her veryownbabyBucee!

RootBeerFloat

Last Saturday we went to a baby shower. Instead of cake, they had RootBeerFloats. Neither totgirl nor babyZachy (of course) had ever had one. I gave totgirl a 'sip,' which turned into her drinking up pretty much all the rootbeer. What a smile she had on her face after!

And then it was Zachy's turn to have a 'little taste,' I put the straw in his mouth and he licked it and very promptly figured out how to suck any remaining liquid up the straw. I don't care what the experts say, I guess sugar does motivate learning. Once he couldn't get anymore out the straw, next thing you know, he puts his hand in the cup and starts, quite aggressively, scooping out whatever he could get. It was HILARIOUS! And a bit messy...

LastNight

Last night Dad had a big football game on the t.v. that he wanted to watch. Arizona vs. Iowa. Usually we divide the bedtime duties...he takes totgirl and I take babyZachy. Last night I planned on putting both to bed. I picked totgirl first, since she had gotten up at the unGodly hour of pre5 a.m. and had barely napped. I figured she would be quick. And, she was, fairly quick, but not quick enough....

While I was putting her to bed, I could hear babyZachy crying. He really is a bit of a Mommy's Baby still and tends to rely on me even more at night for comfort, as he winds down from the day's activities. Perhaps I would have put him to sleep first, but it was hard to tell if he had gotten enough sleep for him during the day, since his napping needs have never been as well defined as I would like.

I shall forever remember the first year of his life as the Year of No Sleep. Totgirl was sleeping through the night at 10 weeks. She has always done better cosleeping, but she slept. But babyZachy was another story. He had normal infant sleep patterns until about 4 months old; Was not sleeping through the night, but was within the normal limits of what the 'books say' would be expected of a baby his age. Then at 4 months he started to wake up pretty much on the hour. I remember taking him to his 4 month appointment at the Pediatrician and saying I thought it was a 'phase.' That phase lasted for about the next 6 months. I still have a hard time wrapping my brain around how little sleep I got during that time.

At about 10 months his sleep 'improved,' meaning he was getting up fewer times a night, but still far from great. To clarify, he got enough sleep it seemed; he would fall back asleep while nursing; It was me who was not getting anywhere near enough. And, during the day, no matter what I tried, I could not get long naps out him. So, I was losing my MommyMind. At about 12 months I decided I just couldn't do the nights anymore and, very honestly, me getting so little sleep was not working well for anyone, especially since the days were long too. So, Dad took over night duty. Actually, Zachy does better when Dad responds to him in the night; with me, he would want to nurse and nurse and nurse. And, Zachy has moved to one nap, which actually seems to be working; Life is looking up on the sleep end! Sleep issues aside, Zachy has been a really easy baby. I guess they all have to have something to keep us on our toes! But man, I knew I probably wouldn't be lucky enough to have two that slept through so early, but honestly, never in my wildest imagination would his sleep be so erratic!

Even thought Dad has taken over the overnight duty, I still put Zachy to sleep at night. We have our special time, all alone. Last night I heard him crying when I was putting Mackenzie to sleep and by the time I got out he had cried himself to sleep. I was so sad. Not only because he cried to sleep (some would think this was a good thing, probably my Mom for one), but because it was the first night in a 265 plus 29 days that I had not snuggled with him before he went to sleep for the 'night,' told him good night, told him how much I love him and kissed him good night.

He is as happy and as fine as ever this morning and Mommy couldn't get in the room fast enough to wish him Good Morning when he woke up!

JackPot!

Today we went to the park to play with some friends from school. We are so lucky to be part of the totbabycollege community. Lucky not only because it is such a wonderful place, but also because we even 'got in.'

We 'live' in a small community with limited childcare options. When I was pregnant with Mackenzie, I heard that the community college was opening up a Child Development Center and that they would open up for infants the January after she was born. This seemed like a perfect prospect. She was born in August, maternity leave through November; We would have to figure something out for a couple of months, but the idea seemed doable. So, I put her on a 'waiting list.' The program prioritizes the wait list: 1. Students, 2. Faculty/Staff, 3. Community (that would be us). Never heard anything and we ended up finding a person who could babysit her out of their home. So, the 1:1 seemed like a great idea. About 6 months after I returned to work I got the call that there was an opening. Content with our current situation, I turned it down (very stupidly in retrospect, which makes me feel even luckier; Although I do seem to recall that the first offer was for a 3 day a week spot and we were only interested in 2 days.). A few days later the Director called back and said she had a Tuesday - Thursday spot. Still feeling loyal to our current babysitter, I again turned it down, but asked about being kept on the wait list for the toddler rooms and asked if I could see the center. We scheduled a tour and Mackenzie and I went for a visit. Love at first sight. We went in the infant room and what a peaceful environment. From the moment I stepped in the room, it was clear that the center did so much more than babysit, which is what I had heard often happens at daycares. Babies were crawling and rolling and moving freely; They were not being confined and pacified in bouncy seats and swings. As we moved through the different rooms I loved seeing how happy and engaged the kids were. They were PLAYING! Very.Happily.Playing. Content. Learning through play, which also fit with my ideals on what I would want in a Child Development Center: A philosophy that kids learn through play, not by pounding the ABC's into their brains. That's going to happen. And the social interaction. We actually live out of town, a rural area with very few kids. When I visited, I had the realization that this was Mackenzie's opportunity to get that peer social interaction we struggled to find ways to provide. So, I talked to Jeff (dad) and, although I had to sell him on the idea since we tend to be loyalists by nature, we made the switch. Three weeks later, she started.

I have to say it has been one of the best parenting decisions we made. Totgirl has thrived there. Her and several other kids have been together for 3 years and are developing friendships, as well as with new kids who joined later. Because siblings get first priority, Zachy was able to get a spot as well and he also seems to love going there and I know he will for many years to come. The staff who work there are brilliant. Not only are they highly educated, but, much more importantly, they are solid, energetic people who are clearly invested in providing the kids in their classrooms with an exceptional social and learning experience. Although the center is in it's infancy at 3 years old and is in a small town, they have visitors related to early childhood education from around the country since they have developed a model program. Can you say 'We hit the JACKPOT!'?

Totgirl's Toddler B  teacher, Miss Lisa, made her a lovely DVD with pictures and music that captured their year together. Getting a glimpse into that part of my child's life, the part that happens when she is away from me, was such a gift. I cried. In those pictures I saw my daughter live through a year of transition. Saw her grow up from a toddler into a little girl. I saw pictures of her the first weeks there, which was when her babybrother was born. I saw that she was okay and in a safe, supportive, loving environment those weeks, the weeks her life was changed forever (I like to think for the better, but at the time I know it was overwhelming for her, as of course it would be for any 2 year old.). And they nurtured her that year, through ups and downs as we all adjusted to being a family of 4. I am so grateful.

And Zachy is in the infant room. He is taken care of by the same primary caregiver who took care of Mackenzie. Ironically, she had left the center right before Mackenzie moved up to the Toddler A room and returned just after I had Zach. The infant teachers were totally excited to have Zachy coming their way. So welcoming, it felt like I was taking him to family. Their happiness for us was clear and honest. Turns out even though Miss Kim is Zachy's primary, he has a thing for Miss Karla and follows her all over. Cracks me up! I can totally relate since that is what he does with mommyme at home. I rarely pick up, but one day I did and when I opened the door Miss Karla was at the sink rinsing something and there was Zachy, right at her feet screaming for her to pick him up. He did, however, come right over to me when he realized I was there though...that's my boy!

So today we got to be with our friends from the totbabycollege. Totgirl loved seeing Miss Lisa, her old teacher from Toddler B and got to Thank her properly for her wonderful music gift. I got to tell Miss Lisa verbally how much we love it and share with Miss Lisa how Mackenzie shows it off to anyone who comes over and how we even got the Wiggleworms CD, which is where the music she used came from. I also got to get a picture of Miss Lisa with Mackenzie, since, of course, Miss Lisa is always the one taking the photos. Mackenzie was so happy to get the chance to reconnect some with Miss Lisa. Warms my heart just seeing them together and seeing their relationship. And Mackenzie also liked getting the chance to visit with Miss Anne, her preschool teacher. Zachy got to see Miss Kim and a few of his baby friends were there too....friends I hope I continue to see him with 2 years from now, like I get to see Mackenzie with hers. I got to see Mackenzie play with her friends Saige and Jordan and Emmerson and Andrew and Mathew and Teddy. A really nice time today, a reallyreallyreally nice time. Yep! We hit the JACKPOT!

TheDress

This summer, totgirl decided she likes dresses and won't wear anything else.

This started in mid-June. We had some friends coming over to play and she put on a cute little shirt with shorts. For whatever reason, the shirt made her feel like a little Princess and she danced around singing our own special PrettyPrincessSong. The following morning when it came time to get dressed, she saw the one and only dress she owned and HAD to wear it and, of course, the PrettyPrincessSong followed. I promptly decided a trip to town was needed because the girl looked so cute in her little dress, how could I possibly deprive her of more? So, we bought a couple more and, in the weeks that followed, a couple more and a couple more and so on and so on. For the first couple of weeks, she would still wear shorts and tshirts to totbabycollege to her 'Tuesday/Thursday classes.' But one day this all changed. I continued to try every school morning for a month to get her into shorts and a tshirt, determined that she had to get SOME wear out of them. I would set them out the night before, but sure enough, she would go pick out a dress. One morning, as we were nearing a much anticipated vacay to California to see Grandma and the cousins, I said to her, 'Don't you want to keep your dresses nice for California?' She ran to the other room where her shorts and tshirt were laid out and ready for her, came back rolling them up and said, 'I keep these nice for California.' It was at that point, I knew it was pointless to try any longer. So, as the summer comes to an end, I have given away a full dresser full of basically new shorts and shirts (held back a couple things, but I have little hope they will get worn much, if at all).

But what about TheDress? There was one dress I would always suggest to her, but she would never put it on. Such a cute dress, plaid with nice subtle hues. Not unlike several others she would pick out on her own and put on willingly. But this dress, she would refuse to even try on. She would tell me it was just 'not cute.' Then when the pottyhumortalk started, she would call it 'stinky' or 'poopy.' When we were in California I tried to play on her love for Grandma and told her how much Grandma would love it. Nope, still refused to wear it. Any other dress, just not THAT dress. So, I figured it would be, like all her shorts, another piece of clothing to go unworn and, finally, after California gave up on TheDress for once and for all.

But then a few days ago happened. Went to pick out her dress for the day and to my surprise, she picked TheDress. All her on own, she picked THAT ONE. How random! My Girl never ceases to amaze. She knows what I want and what I like, but she is determined to be her own person. These things can frustrate the begeebies out of me, but I LOVE it. I LOVE her. She is strong willed and independent. She has willpower and spirit. She's myveryspecialtotgirl!

And, now for the PrettyPrincessSong:

I the pretty princess, I so cute.
I the pretty princess, I shake my caboose, shake my caboose.
I put my hands in the air, hands in the air.
I turn around, turn around
And I fall to the...GROUND!

Maybe there are no Grammy's in our future, but it is OUR own little song!

And now...here it is...TheDress....

WhatAboutZachy?

What about Zachy? I feel like posts, at this stage of the game, tend to be totheavy. There is a reason for this, maybe not a good one, but there is a reason. She is 3 and he is 1 (like I said, not necessarily a good reason). Her being sort-of just dominates. She talks and that, in itself, provides loads of material and, for better or for worse, she has had two more years to develop her personality and idiosyncrasies. But, don't be fooled. I find just as much dailydelight in mysweetbabyZachy! So, let's talk a little about Zachy, shall we?

Zachy is just over 1, twelve plus one months in another few days. Zachy turning 1 was really happysad for me, more happy than sad, of course, but definitely happysad. Actually, when Zachy got his first tooth at about 7 months, I cried. Really, you would have thought he was going away to college. I saw his babyhood WAY too quickly slipping away. But, I have since come to terms with reality: Simply put, developing and reaching milestones is necessary and...(I can say it) GOOD! He MUST grow older, he MUST learn to do new and exciting things.

Zachy has spent the last year of his life charming people. I know I am his Mom, and I know I have a bit of bias, but he really is a charmer. His eyes have been HUGE from moment one. People LOVE his HUGE eyes. These, along with his mischievious smirk, are engaging. They make people WANT to talk to him. They make people WANT to get a full-on smile out of him. Most fabulously, they make people who see him just a little happier for the moment. And, when they DO get a full, wide open Zachysmile, it is purejoy! This baby has the biggest, most delightful smile I have ever seen. It is contagious. I remember a friend seeing a picture of Zachy with his big, purejoy smile and called it 'ridiculously cute.' There! Proof that I am not totally biased.

Lately, well probably longer than lately, but lately Zachy has started to laugh hysterically like only a baby can. There is NOTHING more honest, in my opinion, than a laughing baby. Their laughter is completely spontaneous. We adults will try all sorts of silly things to get a baby to laugh. But, what exactly determines what they will find funny, is one of the great mysteries of all time.

Things Zachy finds hysterically funny these days include:
1. Sticking out his tongue and having you do it back to him;
2. Tug of war over anything;
3. Playing chase (espcially with his sister);
4. Flapping his hand over his mouth;
5. Blowing in your face and you blowing back in his;
6. When he covers his face with something and you ask, 'Where's Zachy?' and then yell 'Peek-a-boo' when he reveals himself;
7. When his sister hides and plays Peek-a-boo with him;
8. Putting bowls on his head (he finds this even funnier if there is something super messy in it);
9. Sitting on his bum on the bed, bouncing up and down and then making himself fall over frontwards and backwards;
10. Touching pointer fingers like E.T.;
11. Clucking (this had him up one night about 3 am for an hour...now THAT I could have done without!); 12. Random play interactions with his sister;
13. Getting surprised;
14. Putting totgirl's 'bead' necklaces around his neck (I realize that this is wrong on so many levels...);
15. And so on and so on.

What does Zachy love to do these days? CLIMB. That is for sure his favorite thing. On his first birthday he climbed up a slide. I was impressed when he made it half way up and then after a few tries...BAM!...he was all the way up and SO-VERY-PROUD of hisbadself. He climbs on anything he can figure out how to climb. A couple of nights ago he climbed in and out of the bathtub (yet again, wrong on so many levels). He also likes to dance and has been doing the babybouncebumdance since probably about 6 months. He even has some song recognition now. He loves the songs 'Very Tall, Very Small' and 'If Your Happy and You Know It;' He claps on cue when hears the phrase, 'Clap your hands,' and also knows to put his hands over his head during the 'Very Tall' song. Oh, and he loves to make people laugh. I was telling his Dad the other day that we probably miss half his funniness because our attention is split between two. He is into everything, loves to get into whatever his sister is doing and rock her world. Oh, and how could I forget? He LOVELOVELOVES to be outside. Anything outside. He loves to play in the sand, pick it up and watch it fall, move his feet around in it; He loves to put it in things and pour it out. Same with water, he loves waterplay. Today he and his dad played football, he loved that. He is also a curious little guy and tries to figure out how things fit together or what they do. Too many things to list! And lastly, cannot forget his sister...he loves his sister and playing games with her. And when the two of them play and laugh together, doesn't get any better than that...MommyMelts!

What do I adore about ZachyCuteCute. His hands. His feet. His (sorry Zachy, but it is true) reallyreallyreally perfect little baby bum-bum. I could go on and on, but I cannot forget, I love him in his PJ's....nothing yummier than that (both him and his sister)! And sleeping...what a sight.

I LOVE YOU ZACHY! I am incredibly blessed and so very grateful that I was given the gift of you in my life....you are absolute PureLoveandJoy.

TotPower

Today we had a playdate with Miss Ari, almost 3, and Miss Cate, almost 1 and their Momma,  Tess. A little fun for everyone. Our friends were kind enough to join us at our house. Totgirl and Ari played great. Just a few days ago I read somewhere that kids around this age have about an hour limit where they can play well together. Our girls probably did 2-3x that. Sure they had their moments, but perfection would be waywayway too much to expect or even shoot for. Probably helped that we took a lunchbreak, which was timed pretty well. Did I say timed? That would imply planning and organization, which both RAN out the door when I became a mother! But Tess and I were able to enjoy some yummy (If I do say so myself) sausage, pepper and bean soup out of the crockpot with a salad (from a bag, but it hit the spot) while our totlets munched on PB and J's

Back to the togirls...watching them evolve as friends over the last few years has been exciting. They first met as babies and now, almost 3 years later, are learning to take turns and play cooperatively (I use the term 'cooperatively' loosely...). I think they really took their totship to the next level a few months ago during a playdate at the courthouse. That was when the girls discovered how effectively they could push limits as duo. Talk about TOTPOWER!!!!! They learned that teamwork works. They ran together way past the boundary we had established and when we told them to come back, they looked at one another, shook their heads and smirked in unison, and ran farther, in the opposite direction, of course. They also played a more contained running game, and, while their individual rules were not always the same, they seemed to manage to make their rules mesh, so that they could continue to run and rest in harmony. It was absolutely delightful to watch, even the totboundarypushing. Gotta love their spirits, determination and spunk, afterall.
When Ari attended Totgirl's 3rd birthday party, the moment they saw one another, they ran off and it was like witnessing two partners in-crime in-action. Naturally they ran away and continued to go farther when we asked that they stop. We asked ourseleves and each other whether it would be quite as funny 10, 12 years from now? That's a bridge to be crossed another time.

Zachy and Cate hung in just fabulously through the playtime.mommytime. They even interacted a bit and briefly played blocks together. They were like two old friends who go waaayyyy back...at least 6-7 months...

Both of them were pushed beyond their comfortzones, not getting in their normal naps and being way more stimulated than usual, but they managed. Zachy is now, unfortunately, taking a nap at 4 pm. But, having the opportunity to connect with and enjoy friends is well worth the schedulebuster (another loosely used term....'schedulebuster,' since Zachy's adherence to a schedule is tenuous at best).

And, Zachy is now the proud new owner of....drumroll please....a PILLOWPET! An ever-so-totally-adorable TurtlePet. He loves it already, I can tell. He loved rubbing it and feeling how soft it was; He took a little rest, not nap, but a rest, on it after they left; I took the tag off and he kept trying to place it back on. So, yesyesyes, he LOVES his TurtlePillowPet.

And, for Totgirl, also as a belated birthday present, she was given her first set of Littlest Pet Shop characters. I see a collection in my favorite little hoarder's future. She took them with her to snuggle with during her shortlived fauxnap.

So, that was today. A BIG THANKS to MommaTess, AriTot and babyCate for a wonderful time and much loved and appreciated gifts!

TotZachyLove

Today was a work day, which meant totbabycollege for the youngin's. I do miss my babies when I work. I feel fortunate that it is only two days a week. Talked on the phone to my totgirl on the way home. Funny having a phone conversation with her. She kept asking, "Are you home yet?" Finally I told her I had to wait at the road construction first and she asked if I was 'stuck.' Some of the things she picks up are hilarious. Daddy is a much more patient driver, he teaches waiting for your turn when you are at the road construction. Mommy? Mommy teaches that you are stuck and it is frustrating. Ahhhh, I am having a proud, oh so proud, MommaMoment (cough, cough)!

Totgirl didn't want to go to school today, which was a little strange for her....hmmmm.....she LOVES school. Wonder what is going on with my little lovegirl? I emailed her teacher and it seems she has been spending quite a bit of time looking through the window into the infant room, where Zachy plays...and standing at the fence on the play yard, which borders the infant play yard. A lot of time...watching her little brother....all through free choice time and outside playtime. All the pictures she has made at school and brought home this week have been for Zachy. I wonder if she is feeling a little sad because she knows he will soon move up to be with new friends in the Toddler A room and she won't be able to see him? I realize now that she has no real concept of time and so all she knows is that he is going, not when, just that he is. Seems that her increased watching over him has coincided with her verbal realization that he is moving. I'm thinking maybe, just maybe, I am on to something. Now, the challenge is....what to do? How to handle it so that she feels secure and prepared for his move at the same time? I think I shall sleep on that one.

I must say one of the hardest parts of being a mother is worrying about your kids and seeing them struggle at all. They must struggle, I know; It is a part of life. But, it is hard to watch. And I ask myself, 'Did I talk too much about it?' I was trying to make sure she was prepared. I know how much she loves their morning routine and watching Zachy get dropped off right after her. I know how much she loves getting to check on him during the day (even before it became an all day thing), So, I wanted her to know, know that he would be moving. But, like I said, I realize now, she does not really understand the 'when factor' of the move. MommyGuilt has officially set in...

On a happy note, her teacher also commented on how much they love her silly and bubbly personality! I love when my totgirl shares the fun loving, sparkling side of herself...her eyes twinkle and her whole face lights up. I know I am her mom, but it really is infectious. Her teacher also assured that they are all supporting her through her transitions and care very much about her. LOVELOVELOVE her totbabycollegepeeps!

Lastly for today, Zachy's daily report card said, 'Zachary is talking all the time! He has so much to say. It is his very own, special Zachary language! :-) Miss Kim.' She is ab-so-lute-ly RIGHT! He HAS become quite the 'talker' and he DEFINITELY has a lot to say. He points his finger for emphasis and gets a real serious look on his precious face. And he uses his to finger to point and say, 'That.' On occasion, we get the 'ut' part of the 'ut-oh,.' Of course he says 'Mama' and almost 'Dada.' Other than those understandable words, Miss Kim is right, it is his own special Zachary language!

Time to go....have I  mentioned how insanely I love my babies?

TwoBabiesDown!

I work two days a week. One day a couple of weeks ago when I got home I saw two little feet coming at me from under the porchshade and heard the sweetest little voice say, "Did you miss me today Mommy?" I melted. And, Yes I had, veryveryvery much so my littletotgirl.

This morning I woke up and looked at my little totgirl and told her I loved her. In her sweet little 3 year old voice, she replied, "I love you too Mommy." I melted yet again. What a perfect way to start the day, even if it was 5:20 am she woke up early due to having had a potty accident in the bed. But really, could the day have started any better? I'll have to hold on to that sound for today and remember it when she tells me I am 'stinky.' Yep, the potty humor and insults have begun! She will tell me she wants to eat 'poopy,' and one time she got mad at me and told me that I had to go to the naughty corner. I asked her where that was and she said, 'By the poo-poo.' Of course, where else would it be, afterall?

My babyboy (really probably technically a totboy now, but I refuse to acknowledge him as so quite yet) woke up about an hour later. I love how he (almost always) calms the moment he sees me. It has been like that pretty much from day One. I love to snuggle with him in the morning and, still nursing, have that time together that only we get to share.

Now the day will be filled with playing preschool. On my two workdays, totgirl and babyboy attend totbabycollege, a really awesome, fun place with wonderful caregivers. I am filled with gratitude for these most gifted people, the ones who care so excellently for my children when I am not.

I digress...so totgirl loves to play preschool. She has renamed all the rooms in the house; We have the pre-k room (aka the kitchen), the babyroom (aka the backroom), the preschool room (aka the living room) and the outside (aka the playroom); We spend our days doing circle time, naptime, snacktime and so much more; I have to ring bells to get her attention, shout '1, 2, 3...lunchtime!,' and address her, not by her own name, but as 'the friends' (i.e., 'Would the friends like to come eat?'), Sometimes it can be a little nuts because I don't really know all the rules (not to mention I have a strange feeling the rules change as quickly as the totmood at times. I know, say it isn't so!), but actually I learn from watching her recreate her totbabycollegeworld and, every now and then, it can work to my advantage in gaining some level of totcooperation.

What's really fun, as well as somewhat dangerous, is watching the kids 'play' together. Totgirl, 3, has definite ideas of what is going on and babyboy, 1, has his own sort of ideas as to what is going on. Totgirl goes back and forth between trying to alter her version to match his and just getting annoyed with his lack of cooperation or destruction of the perfect order of chaos she has created, which is where the danger element enters. They do have a few games where they have relatively well established, mutually agreed upon rules and enjoy playing together. Crawlchase and Tug-of-War are the two favorites. One day they were playing Tug-of-War and suddenly I heard a loud cry from babyboy and, after about a 5 second delay, a loud cry by totgirl afterwhich she yelled out 'Two babies down!'

I am one lucky Momma :-).